Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

The whole of life is about saying what we mean and meaning what we say.

But it’s worse than being duplicitous if, by doing so, we upset people.

We can only be blessed in saying what we mean and meaning what we say when we have oriented our hearts toward love. And to love, suchlike, is to consider everyone more important than the self.

Having achieved a heart for others through the blessing of the Lord, we are then primed and positioned to say what we mean and mean what we say – because truth is worse than hopeless when without love.

It will take a special courage of vulnerability with ourselves to risk the exposure of our own feelings in saying what we mean and meaning what we say.

We can only manage such a task, that requires a fullness of consistent and selfless love, when we are in sync with God, for only by God have we the vision of what can be achieved – a life replete of virtue.

To say what we mean is loving when others are blessed. To mean what we say is our commitment to truth.

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For a Christian meaning what we say and saying what we mean is vital. We are people of integrity as much as we are people of the Book. Indeed, the Book is about the integrity of virtue. If we miss that, we miss the whole purpose of grace. Grace gives so that others might receive; Jesus on the cross and resurrected, one man, for all. The Father’s grace for each one of us.

Our grace – which is to say what we mean (to speak the truth in love) and mean what we say (of and in love) – is the measure of our submission before God.

Our grace is the epitome of the Father’s grace – to put our needs on the cross and crucify our desires so others’ desires may be satisfied. It will cost us to say what we mean and mean what we say from this backdrop.

Our grace is the fortitude of our being knowing we are nothing now without Christ, but we are everything now with him.

To say what we mean and mean what we say is our privilege in a life that is blessed by God when we realise it is how we are to love people with the truth.

If we say what we mean and mean what we say, all in love, we will go far in this life.

Romantic Birthday Gift Ideas – Top Ideas For Him and Her

So that special someone of yours is turning one year older again and you are at a loss of what to give him or her? It is not only his or her birthday but also the growing bond and love between the two of you. Giving a romantic and thoughtful gift is one of the best way to say thank you and appreciate him or her for the things they have done for you all this while.

Idea #1 Photo Frame with your picture inside

Give him or her a really nice photo frame with a picture of you two already inside. This is really a great gift to give because this gift can be placed anywhere in your room and you can see it everyday. If you are great with crafts, it would be better if you hand make a photo frame as a gift and it would reflect great on you!

Idea #2 Couple T-Shirts

Have you ever walked on the streets in a pair of matching shirts? If your answer is no, this is perhaps a good time to give him or her a matching T-Shirt and the two of you can wear on this special day and enjoy a special day out!

Idea #3 Sweetheart Bear

I believe every girl have a soft spot for cute things. Just look at the picture above! Isn’t the bear so cute? Oh…!!! If your girlfriend has a soft corner in her heart for teddy bears then this can be the perfect birthday gift for her. This will surely bring smiles on her face. Teddy bears cannot get much sweeter than this. To make it more perfect add some roses along with the bear and I bet she will be flying to the heavens!

Idea #4 Custom Drinking Mug

Forget about the couple shirts if you are too shy to wear them. A custom couple mugs is just the right thing to do. This can be romantic as you have romantic words on them as well as your pictures and the person will be using the mug everyday. I think it is really sweet!

Idea #5 A Surprise Treat

Treat her or him to something he love but he feels too thrifty to go. An example is a luxurious full body massage spa which she yearns to go but finds it too expensive. Make her feel touched and loved by sponsoring her and perhaps joining her in a couple room for the massage!

Till then, clarence

The author writes articles on romantic ideas for couples to spice up their love lives.

He Proposed – Now What?

You and your guy have moved to the long-awaited “next level” of your relationship, called getting engaged. What do you do now? Many future brides start a diet, hire a personal trainer, shop for the perfect dress, experiment with updos, and hire a wedding planner.

What is often left out of the flurry of planning for the big day is reality! Every couple getting married wants their wedding day to be special, but they often lose sight of what’s really important. Here’s an unconventional guide to being engaged.

Remember to be engaged. That means to focus on the relationship and nurture it during this time. This is the number one mistake I see couples make: They make the wedding the be-all and end-all and lose sight of the relationship. They make it about the one-day wedding instead of the decades-long marriage.

Get into reality and stay there! When you remember that the important thing is the marriage, rather than the wedding, it’s easier to stick to your budget. The stress of paying off the big bills from the big day and the big honeymoon can seriously jeopardize a new marriage. That doesn’t mean you must wear a burlap sack as a wedding dress and serve rice cakes at the reception! But staying within your means becomes easier when you keep things in perspective: one day, versus many years.

Make it about meaningfulness and fun, rather than appearances. You’re not going to get an Academy Award for your wedding performance. This is the time to enjoy yourselves together, not crash diet to get the slimmest photos. Choose a song for your first dance that you truly love dancing to together, rather than thinking of it as a command performance with an audience of critics. Same with the vows: It’s about what is meaningful to you and your partner, not about playing to the back row.

Make time to enjoy each other and talk about things other than the wedding. The wedding plans may feel all-consuming, but when you remember to put the merry in marriage, you’ll have more fun with the plans. Six months after the wedding, no one’s going to remember whether you had the plain chairs or the ones with curlicues. But that fight you had in the car on the way to the dance coach? The fall-out from that can have a very long half-life.

In relationships, as in life, it’s not the destination that’s as important as the journey. That destination wedding is just a destination. The marriage relationship is the all-important journey.

Personalized Engagement Presents

Engagement present ideas are usually hard to think of. The couple may be your friends. Or one of them may be a family member. Being engaged is such an exciting moment in people’s lives that everything relating to it should be equally memorable. Among the best concepts for gifts for this type of occasion are personalized photo frames, keepsake boxes, and other items for the home.

One option to personalize these gift items is to have them engraved with the couples’ monogram. It is a style that’s very classic and elegant. But remember to choose a font that will match the item. Oftentimes, it’s ideal to keep the font as simple as possible. However, if you know the couple very well, place an image that symbolizes something dear to them, instead of their initials.

A picture frame can be very ordinary as a gift. But if you put something on it that defines the couple, it will instantly have a sentimental value. Frames now come in a wide range of materials. Choose one that you think the couple will like. Wood and metal frames are the most common. But you’ll also find available ones that are made of special fabrics like silk, abaca, and others. If the couple loves uniqueness, look for frames made of exotic materials like capiz shells or cinnamon bark.

It would also be great for engagement presents to be things that they can use as they start their life together and sharing things together. Personalized chests or boxes are also good gift suggestions for soon-to-be married couples. You’ll find them in various materials, leaving you with a number of choices on how to personalize them. If it’s made of wood, you can have the monogram or image carved directly on the surface. You can also have it etched on a small metal plate, which will be secured on the wooden box with a heavy-duty adhesive material or tiny screws. If it’s made of metal, the monogram or image will be engraved. You can also find customized boxes covered in luxurious fabrics like those used in making jewelry boxes. Fine stitching would be best for these types of boxes.

Personalized engagement gift ideas can be endless. You can also apply this concept on other items like vases, metal containers of condiments and teas, and many other things for the home. Best to do this if you know some interesting information about the couple. You have to be aware that you’d need time to prepare this type of gift, especially if the seller of the item itself and the personalizing service are different suppliers.

Serve Your Community

If life is unbearable for you, and you are constantly worried about the future. If you are unemployed and you do not know how you are going to support your family. If you do not have the money to cover your bills, nor can you pay the rent, and you are in danger of losing your home. If you are in danger of having a heart attack or you might have a stroke because of all the problems bothering you. There is a solution for all this.

Take your mind off your own problems, and serve your community. If you have clothes, food for the day, and shelter for the night, then you are better off than eighty percent of people all over the world. I do not have the statics to prove this, but I have read it somewhere a few days ago. Serving your community, there is a special blessing in this. It does not matter how you serve your community, but it helps to take your mind off your own problems for a while. And you notice that other people are much worse off than what you are. What I strongly suggest is feed the homeless and destitute. And do so with your own money, there is a special blessing for the person who gives knowing that the homeless have no way to pay you back. And do not expect to be paid back anyway.

When you serve the homeless and destitute, do be judgmental about them. Unless you know them personally, you do not know how and why they ended up in this situation in the first place. Also, treat them with respect; everyone deserves to be treated with respect unless you did something heinous and despicable. Do everything you can to give them dignity. Because with dignity, they will obtain self-respect, then they will treat you with respect. I know that you earn respect, it does not just happen, but you earn respect by giving respect. With humility, treat people as if they are your own family. Older men, treat them like fathers. Older ladies, treat them like mothers. Always show respect for your elders no matter what situation they find themselves. And take them home to your house and give them shelter for the night. If this is difficult for you to do, imagine being in their shoes, where will they get shelter in the cold night?

The best solution for your worries and the problems that are bothering you, the best solution is to take your eyes off your problems for a while. You will see that your problems are not as difficult as you imagine after all. And you will clearly see the solution to your problem. But the trick is, serve your community. But especially the homeless because they have no way to repay you for your kindness. And the very reason why there are homeless people is for you to learn to exercise kindness and respect for your neighbor.

How to Communicate Effectively With Negative People

The world is full of people who can bring about positive change in our lives.. people who can fill our days with new and rewarding experiences.

Unfortunately, from time to time, we encounter people who are a little more difficult to interact with. Enter The Grumpy One. Their negative comments or actions bring about stress, annoyance, anger or worse. Whether family member, co-worker, client or friend, it can be exhausting to keep up appearances. Worse than that, it can be a strain to constantly keep your temper under control. It’s no secret that I have a short fuse so trust me, I get it.

Short term solutions like avoidance aren’t always sustainable and usually just cause more feelings of anxiety and stress. There may come a time when confrontation is the only next step, and no other solution presents itself. Before initiating any confrontation, consider what you would like to say to that person. Try to be objective rather than defensive and avoid any judgmental language. Don’t try and play the part of the victim, just be honest and straightforward.

Most importantly, calm yourself before you start any conversation. Personally, I need to re-read that three or four times. These issues should not be addressed when you’re angry, or things will escalate. If the person you’re confronting happens to get angry, don’t let their emotions or actions affect you – always try to keep yourself in control. Express yourself assertively and always be direct, but never mistake that with being rude.

It’s important to clearly explain to the other person how their actions directly affect you. It’s equally as important to understand the motivation behind their actions. Ask them to explain why they’re saying and doing these negative things and try to understand their point of view. Try to help them see your point of view. Asking them lots of questions may help to shift their perspective or encourage them to find a more positive way of expressing themselves.

If they’re open to your opinion and want to come to a compromise consider that a great first step towards a more healthy relationship. On the other hand, if there is no forward movement or resolution, gracefully let the situation go and move onward with your life. Don’t let a negative person take positive energy away from you, or damage your well-being.

A lot of positive change can happen when people take the time to listen and come to a compromise. Just remember that not every situation will end with a positive outcome and it’s important to know when to walk away.

How To Get A Man To Be Exclusive With You

If you have been dating a man for a while and the two of you haven’t talked about being exclusive, chances are he is only casually dating you. But as a woman you can actually set things up from the very beginning that moves a man in direction of being committed to you and only you. So below I am going to share 3 simple things you can do to that will make a man want to be exclusive with you.

Be Clear About What You Want From The Very Beginning

If you are looking for an exclusive person to date, let that be known from the beginning. That way everyone can be on the same page. If he knows where you stand, he can let you know if he is looking for that as well. If he isn’t move on and find someone who is. When telling a man you are looking for something exclusive don’t do it in an overbearing way.

Instead just say hey, if you want to date other women that is okay, but I am looking for something exclusive. So before we go any further, I wanted to make sure we were on the same page.” You are not being needy and you are not being demanding. You are just stating what you want. Any man will respect that. And if he isn’t ready he will let you know.

Maintain Your Power

As a woman you never want to be in a position where you are asking a man where the two of you stand. This does two things. It puts you in a very vulnerable position and it gives him all the power. And as silly as it may sound, doing this will make him feel less attracted to you. So maintain your power.

The way you do this is by living your life. Never try to convince him to do something he really doesn’t want to do. Have your standards and stick with them. It’s okay to be selective. Men actually find that attractive.

Be Selective

As I just stated, men like it when you are selective. Men don’t like it when a woman falls head over hills for him too easily. That is a big turn off. If you fall too quickly it will make you look very needy. No one wants someone who is super needy. It’s too draining. But when a woman is sure about what she wants and she is selective, that shows she is fine on her own.

She doesn’t need him and that makes him want her even more. When a woman is selective it tells that man she is going to go on and have a full and rich life with or without him. It shows him you have the power to choose him or not choose him. When a man sees this he all of a sudden wants to make sure he is the guy you choose. Generally speaking this will lead to him wanting something exclusive and committed.

What Can You To Make A Person Regret Not Committing to You?

I often hear from women who are a bit resentful that they haven’t yet gotten a commitment or proposal from the man who they love and have been in a relationship with. They feel as if they have poured everything that they have into the relationship and now have nothing to show for this. And as a result, quite understandably, they wonder if he sometimes feels regret.

An example of what you might hear in this situation is something like: “I have invested two years into my boyfriend. I have always supported him and I have been very loyal and loving. He knew full well when we met that I was looking for something permanent, but he got involved with me anyway. After about a year into our relationship, he told me that he wasn’t going to be ready to commit any time soon. I guess he and I have different definitions of the word ‘soon.’ Because now it has been a year later and he still doesn’t want to commit to me. In fact, he says that he doesn’t know when he will be ready. I am very angry about this. I am not sure if I want to stay in this relationship or not. But I feel like I want him to regret this. How do I make him regret it when I’m probably not going to leave him? I’ve been thinking about withholding my affection or bringing his attention to how lucky and happy our committed friends are. I want him to realize that not committing to me is a big mistake. How can I do this?”

I understand wanting to make him pay attention and realize just how hurtful is not to want to commit. But, you have to remember what you really want. And I’m assuming that what you really want is for him to wake up one day soon and realize that he has been wrong all along and that he wants to commit to you as soon as possible and without waiting any longer. And, looking at the longer term, you want to get engaged and then married and live happily ever after. This is a very valid dream and it most certainly isn’t too much to ask. But you have to be very careful of how you try to bring this about.

Regret is a negative emotion. And if you force that upon him, then he may project those negative feelings onto you or your relationship. You need a plan that reinforces his love for you and highlights the health of your relationship. Withholding your affection isn’t going to do that. It’s only going to make him frustrated, lonely, or unhappy. You don’t want this. It probably wouldn’t hurt to have mutual friends who are happily committed so that he can see that people who are committed can be quite happy. But you don’t want to be so obvious about the fact that you are using your friends in order to drive your own point home. Your boyfriend isn’t likely to think favorably of this and he may resent you for it or he may isolate himself from his friends. You don’t want this either.

You want for him to be happy. And more than that, you want for him to be happy with you and within your relationship. Frankly, if you cultivate a happy, positive, and playful relationship, then there is a very good chance that one day your boyfriend will look around and be hit by the overwhelming thought of “what was I waiting for? I have a wonderful girl in a loving relationship and here I was dragging my feet. I am not going to make that mistake twice.” This is the kind of healthy and benign regret that you want to encourage.

But you don’t want the kind of regret that is build upon fear or guilt or shame. Sure, it’s OK to want him to think that he was mistaken or just incredibly slow. But you don’t want to try to make him think he’s stupid, selfish, or dense. Because this is the man who you love. So sure, it’s OK to encourage him to see that he’s a little late to the party. But you don’t want for him to feel like he’s being punished or that his every flaw is being pointed out. Because this would likely make him think less of you and the relationship. And, as a result, your commitment becomes less likely.

No Anniversary Should Be Forgotten – How to Make Every Anniversary Unforgettable

If I were to make a list of the Do’s and Don’ts for anniversaries, “Do not forget it.” would make it to number one. Number two would be “Make it unforgettable.” If you will think about it, the words forget and unforgettable are more of relatives in the English world. However they really mean differently.

“Do not forget it.”It’s plain it simple, if you fail to remember the day you said “I do.” or the day she said “Yes.” that made your relationship official, you are most absolutely dead. You just dug your own grave man. So, if you don’t want to die just yet, better make sure that this day is never forgotten.

How will you make this very special they etched in that memory of yours?

Man, with the technology we have today, you have all the weaponry to not forget this date and win the battle against death.

Do you have a cellular phone? I bet you do. And I will be surprised if that mobile phone of yours does not have an organizer where you can set an alarm for birthdays, anniversaries and other significant dates. Why don’t you dedicate a minute or two of your time by putting this date and have your alarm turned on? So that you won’t forget. It’s actually simple, right?

If you want to be sure, what is your e-mail’s calendar doing? It also takes less than five minutes to fix your e-mail calendar for this thing. While waiting for an e-mail from a client, why don’t you work on this task? You will surely be thankful and proud of yourself when the time comes. Because you failed to forget!

Make use of Facebook. I’m sure you have one! Who doesn’t these days, right? At the upper right corner of your Facebook page, you will see the word “Events” written in bold. Below it is a box with a question “What are you planning?” Write it down. Then RSVP her. I’m sure she will be pleased.

“Make it unforgettable.”
Honestly, there are thousands of ways to make this special day unforgettable for the both of you. The first step though is not to forget – that is.

In making this day very special and unforgettable all you need to do is have some preparations. Ask yourself. What do you love doing together? What is it that you want to try together? What is she dying to have these days? These questions will help you decide on how you will be able to make your anniversary unforgettable.

What do you love doing together?
Of course, in gracing this event, the enjoyment should not be one way. Both of you should be able to enjoy it. Do you like to eat good food? Then, it’s time to reserve a table for two at a very cozy restaurant that promises excellent food. Do you both love to read books? How about attending a book or poetry reading together? Then ask the organizer to allow you read a poem you’ve made for your better half on that day. That would be very heart warming.

What is it that you want to try together?
You might have been together for so long. It would be nice to try something new. Then do so. Skydiving perhaps? Or a European tour? I’m sure there is something there that could make your list.

What is she dying to have these days?
Anniversaries won’t be complete without the right present. It’s a must have. So, be observant. Look for hints. I’m sure she will give you hints as the day gets nearer. Just pay attention and you will surely be able to find the answer to this question. You will be able to wrap the perfect anniversary gift and tie it with a ribbon of her favorite color.

Love Towels Are Great Anniversary Gifts

Love towels are beautiful towels that can be given to a loved one on a special occasion, such as an anniversary. They are often decorated with sentiments of your love and devotion. They may be inexpensive, but they are useful and will definitely be appreciated.

You’ll find towels all over the place, be it a hand towel in the kitchen, bath towels in the bathroom or neatly stacked towels for the guests. So, instead of using plain whites, it’s time to switch to something bright and attractive.

Striped towels are a popular alternative as compared to their other counterparts. Unlike towels of different colors, here you can stick to the standard pretty colors like cream, butterscotch or white, which look bright and vibrant because of the contrasting stripes that make them stand out. They’re not just preferable for their looks, but you would love towels of different and contrasting colors as they make your bathroom look brighter overall.

Most love towels are made of fine cotton, which is one of the best materials for making towels. It gives a luxuriously comfortable feel against your skin and also has amazing absorbing power. It is also highly durable and maintains great quality for a longer period of time.

These towels are woven from longer strips to give a much more smother texture to them. They can be dyed with any color of your choice. Love towels can also serve as attractive and useful gift items when wrapped in attractive wrapping paper and tied with ribbons. So even if you have a small budget you can gift your loved one with a cotton love towel that expresses your sentiments.

You can also find love towels in striped guest towels; they’re striped diagonally with random fluorescent shade dark colors to make them look very vibrant and colorful. These towels would be too stingy to the eye to use everyday, but they’re fairly appropriate as guest towels. There are also striped hand towels to match. They’ve got beautifully vibrant vertical stripes that alternate with white. They’re made entirely of cotton and are very soft.

These types of bath towels may be relatively expensive, but the comfort and quality is definitely worth the price. It has good absorbency and is very soft and comfortable, but the best part is the variety of patterns that are available. These are slightly more expensive but definitely worth it!

Love towels are beautiful towels made to fit every taste. They not only serve as indispensable utilities but also as gifts for loved ones.